Ready to go ... chemo come and get me!!

Hi everyone,

I guess I must be slightly demented or in total denial but I'm actually looking forward to getting another dose of the chemo under my belt. There's so much anticipation (OK then dread) that its actually a relief when its finally here and I can put another milestone on my path to recovery behind me.

I had the PIC line inserted today and I am very relieved to have it over and done with . The doctor who inserted it was one of those types who can't actually speak and work at the same time ..... so lots of LONG silences and then finally from me "SO ARE YOU IN? ANY PROBLEMS?"Needless to say I received a monosyllable grunt that he HAD been in but was in no longer and would just have to start again ..... the guide wires fault not his own!!! Thank god I am such a nice person (not!!) . I think a couple of words such as this is what I am doing and this is how it is going wouldn't be too hard for a trained radiologist. However it is in and hopefully tomorrow I can get my drugs quicker and without the nurses lining up to have a TRY!!

A couple of other reasons why I am in such a ridiculously good mood despite the fact that my darling Greg has managed to totally incapacitate himself running to catch the train to see the Bombers play at the MCG yesterday resulting in a seriously as in non weight bearing sprained ankle is the following:

I have become addicted to Grey's Anatomy and have about 100 episodes to go. I was watching today at the Austin to see which doctors were having sex with each other or the nurses but for some strange reason I didn't pick up any UST (that's unresolved sexual tension if your not up on the Grey's Anatomy total plot plus sub plot)

I have been to a Body Psychotherapist the wonderful George in Elwood and I can add this to my latest list of cancer cures ... lets see David's chicken soup now Body Psycho therapy!! I wonder if I should publish? I have never felt so totally relaxed (I guess I was hypnotised ) and I had a wonderful vision of an endless stream of black balloons leaving my body with all my negative emotions and past hurts, disappointments, resentments and all that sort of stuff. It was great!!

Can't think of anything else apart from all of you .... my great friends and family who have made me feel so loved and special . Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Love from

Pauline
xxxxx

Its a wonderful chemo free week

Hi everyone,

Just wanted to say hello ..... I've had a great week due to the beautiful weather, absolutely no chemo, lots of Grey's Anatomy and the West Wing plus lots of great catch ups with good friends.

On the down side I could have happily left the Telstra dome at half time instead of having to sit next to my "Bomber brats" waving their little bomber flag in my face every time they goaled!! Oh such a good loser!!!! I think my sister might be right ......football is for dunk heads!!

I've had plenty of walks and lots of good food ..... and unfortunatelty lots of not so good food. Those hot salty potato chips are still tasting pretty good.

Chemo again next Friday and on Thursday I have to have a PIC line inserted which is a permanent (but temporary) line that stays in my arm until the chemo is over .....not exactly looking forward it but will save me the plight of missed veins and painful needles.

So wish me luck. Thanks very much for all your kindness and best wishes not to mention the food, the company, the soups, and books and prayers and positive vibes and bad jokes etc.etc.

Everyone is very well ... Bridget and Danny had a great day at the footy and are enjoying school. Greg is battling on beautifully and my free housekeeper starts on Monday ...... I'm very excited about that. Rex and Lisa haven't missed out on too many walks but if anyone wants some extra exercise next weekend I am sure to be having a date with my bed and bucket so feel free to borrow my dogs if you are inclined!!

Love and kisses

Pauline

Lazarus has arisen

Hi everyone,

Thanks for your blog messages ..... you are very kind. I'm sort of feeling Blog pressure to get out of bed and make an update.!!Last time I just felt pressure to get up and walk my poor dogs. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Now I feel a bit like Carrie Bradshaw except I don't live in New York and that S thing is not high on my list of must do's!!

Since last time I've had my second chemo and felt very ill for 48hours and then a miracle the nausea and vomiting stopped and I ended up having fish and chips for tea. Mmm give me some more of that fat and salt!!!!

Its funny how everything comes down to food when your sick. Woke up feeling good and thought I would do the right thing ......muesli and soy milk for breakfast and its been down hill from there!!! Definitely need to listen to my stomach and it looks like toast and chips are pretty high on the pecking order of comfort food. Bridget purchased a delicious packet of plain potato chips that also hit the spot.

Bridget and Danny are not used to this mother who wants to eat crap food all the time. I suspect there both a little nervous .. what could happen next? Will I let them stay up all night, no school, endless computer games.???

Managed to walk the dogs and drove out to Panton Hills for lunch today with my two beautiful buddies Cathy and Roselaie. Arrived home to home made fairy cakes from Julie and home made soup. Thanks so much. Louise dropped in with goodies last night but would still be recovering from the magnificent sight of Pauline Scott still in PJ's, hair standing up like a cockie and looking pretty average. Oh well. Aunty Rosie is going to drop one day at work and take them as half days during the week to help me and the kids. greg is goin got start an extra day a week from Monday. David if your listening I need your suggested offerings .. who knows they could be the cure to cancer and I could just cancel the next chemo. Cured with David's special soup made from secret Jewish recipe.

Well its back to my other preoccupation apart from food and that is watching as many episodes of the West Wing I can squeeze in between Saint Kilda magnificently beating the poor old Bull Dogs. It certainly pepped me up seeing those magnificent boys putting on a good display and for once even I thought we would win when we were 50 points up with 5 minutes to go. Only a long suffering Saints fan would understand

Every one is well ...... kids are back at school tomorrow and I've got a week off with no chemo.Yippee. Sr Rosemary bless her heart (that is Sister as in nun not sister Rose) is trying to organise a free houseclean once a month. Apparently its a package from DHS so I'm very excited!

Love and thanks for all the messages.

Pauline

Friday the 13th

Hi there. Chemo yesterday, and feeling pretty crook today. We were planning to go away for the weekend but Pauline is feeling pretty sick so we've decided to stay home. Now that Pauline has worked out how to make a post I'm sure she'll write again when she bounces back in a few days. Bye for now. GL

Chemo tomorrow

Hi there every body,

Thanks for your messages of support and yes I will say yes to any vegetable soup or salads!!! My taste buds have gone west unfortunately so everything tastes weird and I have found my usual "healthy" eating diet just doesn't work!How ironic ... now that I am sick again I can't tolerate juices or even green tea. I've been pinching tea bags as in Tetley's from my lovely neighbour and scavenging Easter eggs. Oh well I guess when your putting heaps of chemicals in your body it doesn't really matter what you eat. Plenty of time for being healthy once I get well again.

Just in case any one is asking or your wondering .... I am definitely going to get better again. Me and Greg and the kids are all ready planning our next holiday and its going to be big. Only thing is I'm not going any where without hair!! My hair as in not a wig!! .....and I get the final veto on the the final destination. Given that Danny's best friend just sent him a card from on top of the Eiffel Tower I've got a feeling Paris might be a front runner. Definitely need hair in Paris. its nice to day dream we will probably end up going to Phillip Island or Echuca.

Any way I'm off to the Mercy again tomorrow for my next dose. Wish me luck.
The only way to get through this chemo is to embrace it .......and believe that it is killing those rotten cancer cells. So bring it on!!!

It feels weird not knowing who I'm writing to so send me a hello so I know who is out there.

Love to you all.

Pauline

Day Two

Hi everyone. Thank you for all of your messages of support. There are obviously a lot of people thinking of Pauline and us all at the moment. Please forgive us for not returning all of the calls, but Pauline just hasn't felt up to it yet and we've had a lot of calls. I'm sure in the days and weeks to come she will catch up with all of you. We thought this blog might help in some way to let friends and relatives know how Pauline is going so please feel free to forward the Blog address to anyone you think may want to know how she's going but doesn't want to ring or who hasn't heard from us. We don't want to make a big deal of the blog as it feels a bit impersonal to us as inexperienced bloggers, but if you think someone would like to visit it please feel free to let them know.

The kids spent last night with Aunty Rose and went to see Mr. Bean's Holiday and had a very good laugh. Pauline has been pretty flat today, probably more so that yesterday and hasn't felt like doing much more than dozing in bed. She's had a little but to drink but that's about it. I'm hoping that we might be able to walk up and down the street later and that she'll start to pick up a bit by tomorrow and maybe even feel like making a post.

Anyway. Thanks again. GL

Day One

Well. One lot of chemo down and Pauline's feeling 'pretty average' but has had lots of anti nauseu stuff and a little bit to eat in bed. She's in bed reading and resting at the moment but wants to thank everyone for their kind thoughts and well wishes. Cheers. GL.