Hanging in ... holding up!!!

Hi everyone,

You can tell when I don't blog much that things are tough!!! I am so close to finishing chemo but feel like its soooooooo far away .... which is pretty silly but my poor old body has just about had enough. Not to mention my sensitive mind!!!

It was like this the first time as well. I had to psych myself up so much to get through the chemo that by the time it was nearly over I was mentally "over it". Oh well in 3 weeks I will be finished and ready to prepare for the next stage of living with cancer (whatever that means). One thing for certain is we will all be packing our bags for Queensland to have a lovely holiday courtesy of my generous Mercy and ex Mercy colleagues.

Then I'm going to think about doing the following:

Make a bird bath
Paint all the front bedrooms
Buy a loft bed for Danny and move him into Bridget's room
Move Bridget into Danny's old room
Write a best selling play
Write my memoirs
Book in for a week at the Gawler Foundation
Eat really healthy food and take lots of supplements especially fish oil
Swimming lessons?.......
Meditate every day again
Make lots of salads
Try not to poison the kids and don't give up when they say "we hate this food!!"

that's my list for now ...... not much focus on paid work!! Maybe my paid work days are over. What do you think???
Any other ideas always welcome.

On the home front every one is well. School holidays are fun and its nice just hanging out. Danny and Bridget are going on a country train trip with their friends and Auntie Rosie and her daughter Jessie tomorrow (Happy Birthday Jessie) . We have made a surprise birthday cake and I can safely predict that it will be well and truly eaten by the time they pull out of Spencer Street. There was much competition and general all out "brawling" over bowl and beater licking rights and icing arrangements. The awful thing is I can remember be just as bad if not worse!(Saint Rose of Moonee Ponds wasn't always exactly "nice" in fact she was very mean to me!!!)

Danny is going pretty well although he struggles with his relationship with his big sister who he adores and of course she "suffers" his devotion with disdain. He was just begging her for a kiss a little while ago and she was absolutely refusing as usual. Meanwhile his poor old mum has to practically beg for a cuddle because he is too busy!! We have restricted the use of the computer these holidays and they have both been withdrawing big time and trying to stretch their one hour out through all kinds of devious methods!! What ever happened to "go outside and play?".

Bridget has just had a fringe cut .... which is big news and looks way too gorgeous!!! Her face is so pretty. I was very disturbed to hear that "some " of the grade 6 kids were dating this year . So I hope the boys stay away from Bridget. Luckily she thinks boys (including Danny) are gross!!!

Greg is battling on and is also looking forward to a holiday in the sun. I'm sure he gets very weary and worries about the future ...... but luckily he keeps a smile pretty close to the surface and is fantastic with the kids. The improved Bomber form has been well and truly appreciated and I am as always outnumbered by Bomber maniacs. Danny insists on viewing the ladder at every opportunity and is quite unhappy if I haven't bought the Age every day to consult the Bomber ladder. He doesn't accept that the position won't change after Monday.

Well I had better go and get these kids into bed. Bridget and I watched "Dial M for Murder" today (I love Alfred Hitchcock and so does Bridget now that I have introduced her to the master. Rear Window is my favorite movie) and she is just settling back to watch "How to marry a millionaire" with Marilyn Munroe!!! Danny still has the attention span of a two year old but he was very impressed with the Choir of Hard Knocks!!!

Love to you all. Chemo tomorrow then one week off then 2 weeks on then FINITO!!!!

Pauline
xxxxx